Melvin “Felix the Cat Burglar” Calix busted for burglary
WHEATON, MD. — Melvin “Felix the Cat Burglar” Calix, who cops say is a cat burglar who on one occasion assaulted a resident of a home, has now been rounded up and given a scratching post in a jail cell. Melvin is lucky he was in a county full of liberals who don’t believe in having guns. Had he ventured away from Montgomery County by a few miles the police would have been called to remove his lame carcass after having expired of lead poisoning.