THE MAN OF STEALS, NOT STEEL; Crotch Rocket Driver Stole Bike in Fairfax & Crashed in Dover Resulting in Critical Injuries

DOVER, DEL. — The business of stealing rides can be murder when weaving between lanes and attempting to hurdle around and even over moving traffic. Police say that a nutcase operating at a high-rate of speed in one of Dover’s busiest intersections plowed into a small sedan and went flying through the air, but evidently this bozo forgot his cape. As a result of his short flight he suffered massive injuries requiring yet another flight to a trauma unit.

Governor Marvin Mandel dead at 95; spent last days enjoying grandchildren, Ravens and steamed crabs

COMPTON, MD. — “After an afternoon of eating crabs and spending the weekend in St. Mary’s County and enjoying the Ravens last night,” Phil Dorsey, stepson of Gov. Marvin Mandel, told THE CHESAPEAKE TODAY, “the Governor died at Harborview this afternoon.”

The location of Governor Mandel’s death was at the river-front home of Dorsey, located just off Breton Bay in Compton. Dorsey’s mother, the late Jeanne Blackistone Dorsey Mandel, was married to Governor Mandel in 1974 and became First Lady of Maryland. Mandel had been vacationing with his son Paul Dorsey and Mandel’s grandchildren at the summer place which overlooks the expansive Breton Bay for the last few months as his health declined.

Murder USA: Ticked off at Hubby; Wife Runs Him Over with SUV

LANHAM, MD. — It’s not wise to tick off the old lady, especially when she has a hair-trigger temper and drives a big SUV. The Prince George’s County Police Department’s Homicide Unit arrested a Lanham woman in connection with the murder of her husband. The suspect is 37-year-old Araceli Alvarez- Mendoza. The victim is 36-year-old Fernando Fragoso-Duana. Both lived in the 9400 block of Worrell Avenue.

Dirtbag Roundup: Credit Card Ring Boss Sentenced to Federal Prison

Baltimore, Maryland – The advent of a massive credit card fraud scheme based in Maryland began with a love affair, according to prosecutors. Instead of sending each other love notes, the pair gained access to an embossing machine and expressed their love for each other by creating counterfeit credit cards which they used to steal over $126,000.

Murder USA: Joshua Schellhase sent to prison for only six years for murdering his friend with heroin

GREENBELT, MD. – St. Mary’s County is going to lose the services of a serial drug dealer and user, burglar and professional in the copper reclamation theft business – as well as a heroin killer. For the crime of administering a fatal dose of heroin in 2012, a federal Judge has handed down a somewhat lenient sentence of only six years for Joshua Scott Schellhase of Valley Lee, Md.